Life with Baby K

May 5, 2008

No longer a ultrasound virgin….

Filed under: IVF #1 — by Jess @ 6:17 pm
Tags:

I am no longer a dildo-cam virgin! I had my first ever vaginal ultrasound this morning. I was a bit nervous that they were going to start the ultrasound and discover I didn’t have two ovaries or something stupid. But alas, everything was as it was suppose to be and where it was suppose to be. My lining was 4 mm and I had several follicles waiting to be stimulated in each ovary. Oh, and my estrogen level was 44. So on Saturday eve I start my stims, 225 units of Gonal F, Menopur, and 5 units of lupron. Saturday I start my baby asprin and the antibiotic for Jeff and I. Then I go back to the hospital for more bloodwork on Tuesday morning.

Jeff is going down to the hospital tomorrow to give another semen sample. Hopefully things will work out with the insurance company. I still feel like ICSI is our best bet but I feel like it isn’t the end of the world if we just do “plain old IVF” I was so focused on having ICSI that I forgot that the lab will still process the sperm the day of ER and only introduce the best sperm to the eggs. But like I said I am still pulling for ICSI.

So I have been wondering how you are suppose to balance having hope and positive thinking with the realization that a cycle may not work and trying not to set yourself up for a huge crash? How can there possibly be a happy medium? I am a strong believer in positive thinking and needing to have a positive attitude. And obviously I want this cycle to work. And most of the time I find myself thinking about the future in terms of pregnancy. For instance, Jeff and I, my parents and brother, and my in laws are all going on vacation to Lake Champlain in August. I keep thinking in my head things like, gosh I hope I don’t have morning sickness too badly while we are on vacation. And a part of me really does think this cycle will work. But I also know that things may not work out. I don’t want to focus on the negative things which could go wrong, but I feel like I need to in order to bring myself back down to reality. But then I am left thinking that I am setting myself up for failure! YUCK! What an awful catch 22! So I am reaching out to the IVF veterans, how do you balance this teetering seesaw???

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3 Comments »

  1. Ugg, I dont know if Im considered an IVF veteran–as I have only done 1 IVF, but in my book thats enough to gain battle scars.
    I dont even have appropriate advice for you on how to balance–its tough. You want to be positive, but prepare for the negative. Just try to keep as occupied as possible with lots of things you love doing and surround yourself with people you love! Ill be keeping you company!

    Comment by JJ — May 5, 2008 @ 9:10 pm |Reply

  2. I took my first Gonal F last night. I just got the vial, not the pen. We had to mix it with low dose HCG. I think we used four or five needles to accomplish that!

    Random thoughts on positivity…(good idea for an upcoming blog?)

    I’m trying to look at it like this… I’m GOING to hopefully get pregnant in 4 cycles. If I don’t get pregnant by the end of the third cycle, I’ll allow myself a freak out. This is what I’m telling myself now, though I may sway. However, I would really, REALLY, like to get pregnant by August. A big part of me thinks that I’d rather think I’m NOT pregnant, and be surprised if I am, than feel the letdown from getting my hopes up. Like I said… very random thoughts.

    Comment by PJ — May 5, 2008 @ 9:12 pm |Reply

  3. I am definitely not a Veteran, but my advice is to stay positive and just focus on whatever step you are at. If your gearing up to stim, just worry about that. It can be very overwhelming, but if you just take it one step at a time, it’s much easier to deal with mentally and emotionally 🙂 Good luck!!

    Comment by Laurie — May 10, 2008 @ 9:03 pm |Reply


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